Let’s talk about everything self-confidence in this blog. The truth is self-confidence is all about building self-trust and believing in your ability.
Explore your journey to self-confidence, discovering the 17 actionable steps that help you tap into your inner power, and build confidence! Follow these steps (see steps below) and do the work within yourself and you will see great results I promise you, if you need support you can leverage our coaching service that will give you accountability and support on your journey.
Building self-confidence comes before building confidence, this is because self-confidence is about your internal experience whereas confidence is more external and about how you’re perceived and your skill sets.
We will dive deep into everything you need to work on and focus on building deeper self-confidence so that you can reach your goals.
Why should self-confidence be a goal? Here where is started for me:
Well I’d love to share my story about my upbringing and what drove me to encourage this work to my clients (of course first hand doing it myself.) Growing up my childhood took an abrupt turn, having a young mother who had me at 20 years old. My parents had just immigrated from Romania to Canada to build a new life here.
Things took a turn when my Mom felt like she wasn’t getting what she desired and realistically she wasn’t taking care of herself. When I was about 5 years old she was great, the nurturing loving mother that some people have, and others crave. Something shifted when she had my brother but didn’t want another baby, she wanted to go to med school instead. She started hating all of us, telling me I was a mistake and being quite a bully about her dissatisfied state.
I learned pretty quickly the importance of filling ourselves up, with Self-love, and self-confidence, doing the work, and learning how to communicate what we need. As time went by I realized my Mom lacked all the skills and it deeply harmed her family and ruined her children’s childhood. I never felt safe at home, she was always annoyed with us, I was never good enough, and yes these were all projections but little did she know.
This transformed me into a young adult who wanted transformation.
Having this experience is what propelled me to go on my journey to learning these things for myself, then becoming a coach who now primarily works with clients to help people discover the tools that will support their success and help them not destroy their lives and their kid’s life if you have any of plan to have them like my Mom did.
Are you ready to unlock your full potential and build unshakable self-confidence?
Dive into this self-confidence article below, where I share practical tips and insights to help you overcome self-doubt and embrace a more fulfilling life. Plus, join me on Instagram for daily inspiration and motivation to keep you on track. Let’s build self-confidence together and create a community of empowered individuals who aren’t afraid to ask for what they need.
Have a read-through and hit that follow button on Instagram to join the journey towards greater self-confidence and fulfillment!
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What's The Difference? Self-Confidence and Confidence:
Confidence has everything to do with trust that’s where it’s derived from, the word “confidence” comes from the Latin word “fidere”, which means ‘to trust, to confide, to rely on”. This is why self-confidence is all about trusting yourself (internally) as confidence is all about how people perceive you to be trustworthy or not (externally). I can assure you, that what you feel internally definitely shows up in how other people experience you.
Definition of confidence:
“the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust. the state of feeling certain about the truth of something and/or a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s abilities or qualities.”
Confidence is: Is all about the external experience, your skill set, and external evidence.
Definition of self-confidence:
“a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgment.”
Self-confidence is: about the belief and trust that you have in yourself.
Building your self-confidence comes first, you build your belief and trust in yourself first. Once you have mastered having belief in yourself you are internally powerful. You will start to build confidence, experiencing the external results of feeling confident.
The Importance of Self-Confidence:
Self-confidence is not just a trait; it’s a fundamental aspect of personal growth and development. It serves as the cornerstone for realizing your true potential and achieving your aspirations. When you possess a strong sense of self-confidence, you start to grow and get better at making decisions, setting goals, and accomplishing them. This is because you develop an unwavering belief in your abilities and worthiness, enabling you to navigate life’s challenges with resilience and grace.
Studies consistently demonstrate that individuals with higher levels of self-confidence are more likely to set ambitious goals and actively pursue them with determination and resilience. Moreover, self-confidence influences your inner experience of the outside world. When you believe in yourself and your abilities, you navigate life with a sense of assurance and optimism. Challenges become opportunities for growth rather than insurmountable obstacles, leading to a more positive and fulfilling existence. Furthermore, self-confidence plays a crucial role in fostering healthy relationships with others.
Self-confidence helps with:
- Building self-awareness: By believing in yourself, you become more attuned to your strengths, weaknesses, and values. This leads you to a deeper understanding of who you are and what you stand for.
- Greater management and enjoyment of life: With self-confidence, you approach life with a sense of optimism and resilience, allowing you to effectively manage challenges. Which brings growth, overcoming obstacles, and fulfillment.
- Experiencing less to no anxiety and stress: When you trust in your abilities and worthiness, you’re less prone to the debilitating effects of anxiety and stress. Which enables you to navigate life with peace, calmness, and composure.
- Freedom from fear and self-doubt: Self-confidence liberates you from the shackles of fear and self-doubt, giving you the power to pursue your dreams with courage and conviction.
- Helping you go after goals and achieve them more effortlessly: With self-confidence as your ally, you approach goals with determination and perseverance. Which increases your likelihood of success and fulfillment.
- Caring less about what other people think about you: By cultivating self-confidence, you develop a strong sense of self-worth that is not dependent on external validation. This allows you to live authentically and pursue your path with confidence.
- Enjoying socializing and being around people: Self-confidence radiates a positive energy that draws others to you. You relish social interactions and connect with others effortlessly. Which enriches your life with meaningful relationships and experiences.
Build a Standard for Having Self-Confidence:
Developing self-confidence goes beyond mere positive thinking; it entails establishing a framework and commitment to your growth journey.
Define Your Values: Begin by identifying your core values. Values act as guiding principles, directing your decisions and actions towards aligning with what truly matters to you.
Set Clear Goals: Establish achievable goals that resonate with your values. Breaking them down into manageable steps (so important).
Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, particularly during challenging times. Acknowledge your strengths and celebrate your accomplishments.
Challenge Limiting Beliefs: Address and challenge any negative beliefs or self-doubt that may hinder your confidence. Replace them with powerful thoughts that affirm your worth and potential.
Embrace Growth and Resilience: View setbacks and obstacles as opportunities for growth and learning. Start to welcome challenges, instead of resisting them.
Seek Support and Guidance: Surround yourself with supportive individuals who uplift and encourage you on your journey. Seek guidance from mentors, a coach, or trusted friends who can offer valuable insights, perspective, and accountability.
By establishing a standard for self-confidence and committing to your personal growth, you’ll cultivate a profound sense of inner power and fulfillment. Remember, self-confidence is a skill that can be strengthened over time with patience, persistence, and self-compassion.
The Power of Self-Acceptance & Contentment:
In the pursuit of self-confidence, it’s crucial to recognize the profound impact of self-acceptance and contentment. Rather than striving for perfection or seeking validation from external sources, embracing who you are and finding fulfillment in the present moment are essential aspects of building lasting confidence.
Embracing self-acceptance involves acknowledging and embracing all aspects of yourself, including your strengths, weaknesses, and imperfections. It’s about letting go of unrealistic expectations and embracing your uniqueness with compassion and kindness. When you accept yourself unconditionally, you free yourself from the burden of comparison and self-criticism, allowing your confidence to flourish authentically.
Finding contentment in the present moment is a powerful practice that enhances self-confidence. It involves appreciating what you have and where you are on your journey, rather than constantly striving for more. Cultivating gratitude for the blessings in your life and finding joy in simple pleasures can shift your perspective and empower you to navigate challenges with grace and resilience.
The Interplay with Self-Confidence:
Self-acceptance and contentment are not separate from self-confidence; rather, they are interconnected aspects of a holistic approach to personal growth. When you accept yourself fully and find contentment in the present moment, you naturally cultivate a deep sense of inner peace and confidence. You no longer rely on external validation or achievements to feel worthy because your sense of self-worth is rooted in your inherent value as a human being.
Practices for Cultivating Self-Acceptance & Contentment:
- Mindfulness: Practice being present in the moment, observing your thoughts and emotions without judgment. Try mindful breathing exercises, these both help bring presence, awareness, and acceptance.
- Self-Reflection: Set aside time for self-reflection to explore your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs. To gain insight into yourself, you can journal, read, take a course, or do a visualization.
- Gratitude: Gratitude can shift your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant giving you contentment and appreciation. Practice gratitude by reflecting on the things you’re thankful for.
- Meditation: Incorporate meditation into your routine to quiet the mind, reduce stress, and build self-awareness. You can do guided meditation or silent sitting. Giving you peace and acceptance, connecting you with your inner wisdom.
- Journaling: Dedicate time to journaling to explore your thoughts, emotions, and experiences. Writing allows you to process your feelings, gain clarity, self-express, and gain acceptance.
- Spending Time in Nature: Nature provides a sense of peace, grounding, and perspective. You can do this by walking in the park, hiking in the mountains, or sitting by the ocean.
By incorporating these practices into your daily life, you can grow in self-acceptance and contentment. Which nurtures your overall well-being and confidence level. Remember that true self-confidence comes from a place of authenticity.
17 Key Steps to Building Self-Confidence:
Self-confidence at The You Series starts with doing the inner work, so let’s talk about what that looks like and the top tasks that you can focus on to build your self-confidence level.
1. Build self-worth first:
Invest time in activities that promote self-love and acceptance, such as practicing gratitude, setting and achieving personal goals, and surrounding yourself with supportive relationships. Engage in self-care practices that nurture your physical, emotional, and mental well-being, reinforcing a positive self-image and building confidence from within.
2. Have more self-awareness:
Cultivate self-awareness through mindfulness practices like meditation, journaling, or self-reflection exercises. Pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors without judgment, gaining insight into your strengths, weaknesses, and patterns of behavior. Self-awareness enables you to make conscious choices aligned with your values and goals, boosting confidence in your decision-making abilities.
3. Clarify your core values and stay in alignment with them:
Take time to identify your core values by reflecting on what matters most to you in life. Regularly assess your actions and choices to ensure they align with your values, making adjustments as needed to maintain integrity and authenticity. Living in alignment with your values enhances self-assurance by fostering a sense of purpose and meaning in your endeavors.
4. Be committed to your word (this will build self-trust):
Practice integrity and reliability in your commitments to yourself and others. Set realistic goals and deadlines, and hold yourself accountable for following through on them. By honoring your word consistently, and taking responsibility you cultivate self-trust and confidence in your ability to achieve what you set out to do.
5. Learn to emotionally regulate:
Develop skills for managing and expressing your emotions in healthy ways. Explore techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation to reduce stress and enhance emotional resilience. By mastering emotional regulation, you gain confidence in your ability to navigate challenging situations with composure and grace.
6. Process your emotions:
Allow yourself to fully experience and express your emotions without judgment or suppression. Journaling, talking to a trusted friend or therapist, or engaging in creative outlets like art or music can help you process and release pent-up emotions. Processing emotions effectively fosters emotional intelligence and self-assurance, empowering you to confront obstacles with emotional resilience.
7. Heal past wounds or trauma:
Seek support from a therapist, counselor, or support group to address unresolved emotional wounds or trauma. Engage in healing modalities such as cognitive-behavioral therapy, EMDR, or somatic experiencing to work through past pain and cultivate emotional well-being. Healing from past wounds enhances self-confidence by freeing you from the grip of past experiences and empowering you to embrace a more positive self-image.
8. Deal with problems head-on:
Develop problem-solving skills by breaking down challenges into manageable steps and brainstorming potential solutions. Take proactive steps to address issues as they arise, rather than avoiding or procrastinating. By confronting problems head-on, you demonstrate resilience and competence, strengthening your confidence in your ability to overcome obstacles.
9. Find solutions for your problems:
Approach problem-solving with a growth mindset, viewing challenges as opportunities for learning and growth. Seek out resources, information, or support from others to help you find creative solutions to complex problems. Successfully overcoming obstacles reinforces your belief in your problem-solving abilities, boosting confidence in your capacity to tackle future challenges.
10. Audit your language and internal conversations daily:
Pay attention to the language you use to describe yourself and your abilities, both internally and externally. Challenge negative self-talk and replace it with affirming, empowering language that reflects your strengths and potential. By cultivating a positive internal dialogue, you enhance self-esteem and self-confidence, laying the foundation for success in all areas of life.
11. Communicate your boundaries:
Communicate your boundaries and limits to others, advocating for your needs and preferences assertively and respectfully. Practice assertive communication techniques, such as “I statements” and active listening, to express yourself effectively while maintaining healthy relationships. By establishing and enforcing boundaries, you demonstrate self-respect and cultivate confidence in your ability to advocate for yourself.
12. Stop caring about what other people think, or how they might judge you:
Release the need for external validation and approval by focusing on your values, goals, and priorities. Challenge perfectionism and the fear of judgment, recognizing that you are worthy and valuable regardless of others’ opinions. By letting go of the need for external validation, you free yourself to pursue your aspirations with authenticity and confidence.
13. Have a vision for your life:
Create a compelling vision for your future based on your values, passions, and aspirations. Visualize your goals and desired outcomes with clarity and detail, embodying the confidence that you can manifest your dreams. By having a clear vision for your life, you cultivate a sense of purpose and direction that fuels your confidence and motivation.
14. Set intentions for your desires and goals:
Set specific, achievable intentions that align with your vision and values, breaking them down into actionable steps. Write down your intentions and revisit them regularly to stay focused and motivated. By setting intentions, you clarify your priorities and commit to taking purposeful action, bolstering confidence in your ability to create the life you desire.
15. Go out and obtain new skills in alignment with your goals:
Identify areas where you want to grow and develop new skills or knowledge relevant to your goals. Invest in learning opportunities such as classes, workshops, or online courses to expand your expertise and capabilities. By acquiring new skills, you demonstrate a commitment to personal and professional growth, enhancing confidence in your ability to adapt and succeed in a rapidly changing world.
16. Get out of your comfort zone by taking small actions till you see success:
Gradually challenge yourself by stepping outside your comfort zone and taking calculated risks. Start with small, manageable actions that push you slightly beyond your current limits, gradually increasing the level of challenge as you build confidence. By stretching beyond your comfort zone, you expand your capabilities and develop resilience, reinforcing confidence in your ability to handle uncertainty and adversity.
17. Embody confidence by declaring it:
Adopt confident body language, posture, and demeanor to project self-assurance in your interactions with others. Practice speaking assertively and expressing your ideas and opinions with conviction, regardless of any inner doubts or insecurities. By embodying confidence outwardly, you internalize a sense of self-assurance that positively impacts your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors, leading to greater confidence in all areas of your life.
As we conclude our exploration of self-confidence, we’re reminded of its profound significance. It’s shaps our lives and guides our journey toward personal fulfillment. Throughout this article, we’ve looked into the essence of self-confidence, and distinguished it from confidence. It holds transformative power it holds within.
Self-confidence builds self-trust and our internal beliefs create our results. We’ve learned that self-confidence isn’t just a trait to be admired; it’s a fundamental aspect of personal growth. It serves as the foundation upon which we obtain our goals, and accomplish dreams as well as navigate life’s complexities.
Through introspection, commitment, and resilience, we’ve outlined a roadmap for cultivating self-confidence.
Which begins with:
- Embraces self-acceptance and contentment.
- Building your emotional (EQ) capacity.
- Clarifying your vision and values.
- Setting goals and having a dream.
- Doing the work: practices that build self-confidence.
- The bold declaration of our inherent worth and potential.
Lots of work to be done inside all of those points. We’ve explored practical strategies and actionable steps to fortify our self-confidence, from nurturing self-worth to embracing challenges and expanding our skill set.
As we stand in the possibility, let us embark on this journey with unwavering determination. A commitment to our growth. Remember that self-confidence is not a destination but a continuous evolution, you’re always peeling the layers back. This is a journey that unfolds with each step we take.
In closing, let’s celebrate the inherent power within all of us that any one of us can obtain!
Trust in our abilities, and dare to dream boldly!
True self-confidence lies not in the absence of fear or doubt but in the courage to embrace our true selves and pursue our dreams with conviction.
You can do it! I believe in you! With love Julia!
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Are you ready to embark on a journey of self-discovery? Let’s work together to cultivate the unshakable confidence you deserve. If you’re feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or uncertain about how to move forward, I invite you to take the first step toward transformation by booking a call with me.
I can help!
Julia Maria Nica
Your Transformation Guide
Julia grew up in Vancouver, B.C. She immigrated from Romania to Canada in the ’90s with her family. Julia decided to find her passion. Just like many women, she experienced her own self-image challenges. She came up with the idea of The YOU Series as a part of unraveling the pain of her life. Today she focuses on building The You Series, coaching her clients, and creating new content.